My $80 T-shirt

I went downtown to Kellie O'toole's to drink and watch the Cards clinch on Saturday with my gal and her friend. I was wearing my "I'm Rick James' Ghost, Bitch!" t-shirt from T-shirt Hell , which instantly got some looks as I entered the bar. Within 10 minutes of being there, as I was approaching the bar for a drink, a woman came up to me. She remarked how sweet she thought my shirt was and how her husband (who was standing right there) would like it for his birthday. She offered to buy it off my back. He whispered in my ear that she had money, so aim high. We went back and forth, but settled on $50. Besides, I only paid $25 for it. Luckily she only had 20's, so she gave me $60 for it. I took her "hubby"'s shirt off his back. She walked away and he explained that she was married, but not to him. She sure liked his nuts though. He even managed to talk her into giving me another $20 because he felt like a cheap whore for being worth less to her. My only mistake was not setting the cash aside. I usually don't bring much to the bars. I spent most of the $80 there. And I come to find out that T-Shirt Hell retired that shirt. What can you do? It was still one of the best times I've had in a drinking establishment in recent memory. Then again, sometimes you don't go out remembering much.

This is a great opportunity to push T-Shirt Hell though. Someone may approach you for your uniquely abbrasive shirt and offer twice what you paid for it. Or you could buy some fun shirts from my Cafe Press store and do the same, because millions want "Matt Blunt Sucks Ass" t-shirts. They just don't know it yet.